Catch Up on Funny Stories

These are two stories back from October (October!) that I don’t want to forget.

Earlier in the month Hubster was doing the bedtime routine.  He doesn’t usually (since he works and goes to school so he misses out on this stuff) but I was going to a wedding shower and a Halloween party the fallowing weekend and he would have to take over.  So he was doing bath time and I cleaned up after dinner when I hear him exclaim “Has she ever done this before?!”.  I causally walk back to the bathroom, thinking it is probably something she HAS done many times before – only to walk in and realize she has pooped in the tub.  Nope.  That’d be a first (although, as per my previous post, certainly not the last!)  Hubster was totally deer-in-the-headlights so I said “No… but first thing’s first, let’s get the baby out of the dirty water.”  So he wraps her up in a towel as I clean out the tub.


My other story was a few weeks later.  At this point Seedling starts her nights in her cribs, and I go in about 2-3 times during the night as she wakes up to nurse.  Usually at some point she ends up back in our bed.  But so she had woken and I had gone in to nurse her.  Now, I really don;t mind doing this, I find it sweet.  But I will admit, I’m also being woken up in the middle of the night so staying awake while nursing means I have to DO something other than sit in the dark in a comfy rocking chair.  So I frequently play games on my iPhone or read something.  Something that doesn’t take TOO much intellectual skills (since I’m still mostly asleep) but entertaining.  I frequently enjoy Crappy Parenting.  Have you read it?  If you haven’t, YOU MUST.  It’s hysterical.  So I have slowly been reading through the archives (because I’m a nerd like that) and that is what I was doing this one evening.  Now, as I mentioned, it is funny.  But, I have a mostly asleep baby in my lap who I do not want to wake up.  So I contain myself and don’t laugh out loud, instead I do the silent chuckle thing.  You know, where you breath in and out kind of awkwardly?  So I do this, and Seedling stops nursing and starts crying.  I shush her, and transfer her to the other boob.  She latches and I go back to reading.  Something hilarious comes up, I silent chuckles, she stops nursing and cries.  This goes on once or twice more and I’m a little exasperated.  I mean, come on kid, I’m getting my booty out of bed for you, I’m allowed to read a funny blog.  I’m in that moment where I can either laugh or cry.  So I laugh.  And she cries more.  Which makes me laugh HARDER.  And she cries LOUDER.  Soon I am in full on hysterics, tears streaming, snorting, the whole nine yards.  As my baby is screaming.  All this comotion causes Hubster to wake up, and he comes in.  I’m not sure what he expected, but what he saw was just to weird for his poor addled brain.  I choke out a request for a frozen teether that he goes, hands to Seedling and he goes back to bed.  I call on every ounce of self control and stifle my laughter.  Seedling is seated in my lap, facing my chest.  Holding the teether in her left hand (which she doesn’t mouth but clings to for dear life while pressing it against my arm pit.) and stuffs her right hand into my other arm pit (trying to keep it warm) and finally after much sniffling falls back asleep. 

Awww, parenting 🙂


2 responses to this post.

  1. Ha ha ha ha ha this is too hilarious


  2. This made me laugh. Hysterical


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