Oh Bloody Hell

You guys, I had such plans. SUCH PLANS! It was supposed to go like this:

1-Baby Seedling is born.
2-breastfeed Seedling, causing delayed menses.
3-when menses returns approximately 6 months post partum, start TTC baby #2.
4-conceive baby #2 in summer of ’13, with EDD in spring of ’14.

Why so soon to try again? Well, a few reasons.
1-it took 2.5 yeas to conceive Seedling, and that was unexplainable. If it takes another two years, better to start trying sooner rather than later, especially since…
2-my brother and I are 4 years apart. So that means once he entered junior high, we never went to the same school. We had different interest, different personalities… And while we’ve never had any sort of major “falling out”, we aren’t close either. Not that children close in age guarantees anything, but my observations of other families show a correlation.
3-Hubster and I would like a medium family. 3 to 4 kids. And nobody is getting any younger … Especially with a history of IF!
4-there is a general knowledge that women are particularly fertile right around when they begin menstruating again. Why miss a good window of opportunity?!

But here’s the thing. I didn’t want to get pregnant any sooner than 6 months after Seedling was born.
1-I wanted time to focus on learning the ropes of being a mom.
2-I wanted time to focus on getting my body to a healthy place. I hadn’t met my goal of under 200lbs when I got pregnant before. Since I was so careful about my weight gain with Seedling I’m only about 5-10 lbs heavier than my starting weight. 6 months seems like a healthy, reasonable time frame to lose about 20 lbs.
3- a part of me thinks its weird when kids are less than a year apart, that at a certain window of time they can both say “I’m 4 years old!”. I don’t care if you want that, it just feels weird to me.

If anything I knew my 6-month-idea was a long shot. Lots of breastfeeding women take more than a year to begin ovulation.

But I never expected to start my period right away! The first time I thought maybe it was just a delayed bit of post-delivery bleeding. But now I’m on my second time. My second period.

Say whaaAAAaat?!

So… Nope. I won’t be trying “as soon as my period starts”. I won’t be taking advantage of the “peak” in fertility. I hope I’m not missing out on a crucial window of opportunity… But I’m not ready. We, as a family, are not ready.

I’m trusting the God has this all figured out. Or, I’m trying to trust. Dang me trying to over plan my life, lol! At the very least, I know Hubster and I can go back to considering adoption. There is a lot to think about in that… But I just have to remind myself there is more than one way to build our family. And to stop over thinking, and let it rest until this summer. Easier said than done… *sigh*


9 responses to this post.

  1. Yeah, you pretty much have to breast feed on demand and not supplement to delay menses. Still hardly seems fair you didn’t get more time than that, tho. 😉


    • At this point I basically do feed on demand – except for when my boobs are feeling explode-y in which case I am trying to entice Seedling into eating. Or I pump. But I am never the one making her wait. But returning to work means she’s having to go back and forth from breast to bottle and I’m thinking she’s getting confused and frustrated… Meal times are getting to be cranky times for her. But I’m doing the best I can. :/


  2. Posted by Babycrazykiwi on February 25, 2013 at 11:54 pm

    Oh boy! Last thing you need is dealing with the ole period and a newborn! Sorry it hasn’t gone as expected but maybe this means things will be a bit easier the next time round. Who knows….take care.


    • Thankfully it’s not too intense. It’s actually lighter than pre-pregnancy. Not sure if that’s a bad thing… But whatever it is there isn’t much I can do, so I am just trying to be great full it’s not worse!


  3. I breastfed on demand every 1-3 hours, have never supplemented and STILL got my period at 7 weeks pp and again at 11 weeks pp. I was never regular while TTC and now, when like you, I’m not quite ready to be pregnant again, in suddenly regular?! Oh the irony. It’s so unfair!


  4. Ugh! Totally lame that you already have AF back! I hope that the peak fertility time doesn’t pass you by… So sorry. And cramps after a baby are yucky yuck yucksters. 😛


  5. Ooops, if only life followed the patterns/plans we make for ourselves! I like what you said about trusting God.


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