I lost my patience… Give me a flippin’ baby already!!!!!

UUUUggggggghhhhhhhhh, I started my period yesterday.  Hello cramping and hormones.  If the pain wasn’t enough, the roller coaster of excessive sadness and rage just makes my day.

Is it still “PMS” if it starts the day my period starts?  Wouldn’t that just make it “MS”?

I don’t know if it’s because of where I’m at in my cycle, but I feel like I got a whole new dose of the baby crazies.

*sad face*

I want a baby.  I want to be trying for a baby.

Oh, and ya’ll remember my friend Khimmy from Colorado?  Well she’s in grad school in San Fran… and apparently she’s thinking she might be, could be, pregnant.  Really?  Seriously?!  Off a flippin’ One Night STAND?!?!


Although in our text conversation she was doing the whole “what’ll I do if I’m pregnant?” flip-out and I wrote “Adopt it to me?” (because she’s one of the few friends I feel like I could be that blunt and not offend the piss out of her) and apparently she was already thinking that… so now I’m hoping she is pregnant.

Oh how sick is that?

I have some real problems.

On the upside: A few days ago I stepped on the scale and it read 219.5.  That is HUGE, 30lbs gone!!!!  but of course now I’m all bloat-y and eating chocolate so I’m staying away from the scale for another day or two so I can chug back the water and flush it all out.

Oh, and while Saturday and Sunday’s work shift had me hating my life, the last two shifts of Monday and Tuesday went a lot better.  I think part of it was some good chats I had with co-workers, but also my boss was just in a really good mood so it makes a big difference… I think I’m also getting better at “the ropes”.  I guess more I feel like I can survive this job until we have a family.

Which just brings me back to the baby fever.

December feels really far away.


Happy of the day: I guess it’s a good thing I’m not working because all I really want to do is sit on the couch, snuggled in a blankie with my critters and my hubby and marathon our collection of Friends. Which is exactly what I’m doing.  Whilst catching upon blogs and whatnot.  It’s not a bad day.

Day 42 of 100 Days of Happiness.


9 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by babycrazykiwi on October 20, 2011 at 11:54 pm

    I hate the baby crazies too!!! Hugs to you my girl xxx


  2. not fun at all is it? Big bag of stinking shite, in fact! Love to you, hormones suck donkeybum at this point of cycle, as does biological ticktock


  3. Snuggling is always a good thing to do when feeling all PMSy. I still call it PMS even when its the first day of the cycle. My husband knows better than to correct me when I’m cramping and bleeding so hard that I wish the pain on him.

    December isn’t that far off. Congrats on the weight loss.


    • I guess it happened when I was off work so I could just laze about and snuggle and whatnot.
      I braved the scale this morning and thankfully I only gained a half a pound, so I’m at 220. Here’s hoping I can get the last 20 off and get below 200 🙂


  4. Posted by Storm on October 25, 2011 at 2:27 am


    I’m new to this… everything, the website blog, infertility etc! So was relieved to find your blog sounded just like me! Glad to be following. I’ve been diagnosed with blocked fallopian tubes and have been told i need IVF. Struggling quite alot right now! Found out 4 months ago.



    • Hi Storm! I’m so glad you’re discovering the ALI (Adoption, Loss and Infertility) community. I can definitely say that I wish I had turned to blogging sooner! The community and support is amazing.

      I’m so very sorry to hear about your diagnosis, it certainly can be beyond overwhelming to get that kind of news. Have you started a blog yourself yet? It’s a great way to release your emotions but also allows us fellow bloggers to come alongside you. (Check out some of the blogs I have listed on the right side for more wonderful ladies!)

      Whatever you choose to pursue, know that you’re not alone!


  5. Posted by Storm on October 25, 2011 at 11:34 pm

    Thank you so much, I need to hear that! I might just start a blog of my own, will give it some thought. Many thanks and chat soon then x



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