Unexpected Therapy

So y’all remember when I went to see my new Psychologist, Dr.Empathy.  And made an appointment for Hubster to meet with him.  Well, that appointment was for today.  And Hubster told me last night that he would be home today so I thought it would be fine, but an hour out from his appointment time he was still on the road so I decided to take the appointment.

It actually went pretty well, we talked about my mom a little, and the move, and then got into the fertility stuff.  He asked me about what it meant to be “taking a break” and for how long. (I’m not officially charting, I am not seeing a specialist or taking any medications.  I do keep a casual track of my cycle in my own mind) We talked about my waffling on continuing fertility treatments vs. adoption.  I admitted that while I know I could love an adopted child, I have not yet come to a place where I can let go of the idea, the experience,of pregnancy and birth.  That I really want to try an IUI… and he said something that was so great, in acknowledging that for me if I don’t try this I will always “wonder”… he said “when you decide you want to go to college and know what career you want, you don’t decide to go work at McDo.nalds for a while and put it off.”  I know what I want.  And while we have to wait until after we are moved there is just no point in dragging out this “waiting”.  Because it isn’t really a “break”, it’s just dragging out my time at McDo.nalds while I know I have bigger and better dreams and plans.

Now to just explain that to my logical husband who looks at spending $2,000 for a 15% chance and thinks why even try?  He also doesn’t understand my desire fore pregnancy and birth, he just sees it as a miserable, emotional and painful 9 months and can’t fathom why women want to experience it.  *sigh* men.


3 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by babycrazykiwi on June 15, 2011 at 12:50 am

    Wow that makes so much sense. I will take that advice and file it for later.


  2. We decided that we wanted to try a few IUIs because we would always wonder. I think it helped me let go when it came time to do so. I still wonder what would happen if we tried IVF, but I know that my body would NOT handle that well.

    My husband is a “hard math” kind of guy. When looking at the stats, he didn’t like them. However, we discussed what we would feel like in 10, 15, or 20 years if we had never gotten more information and tried a few things.

    Eventually, he began to understand that doing an IUI was not just a 15% chance, but an opportunity to learn more about our bodies. Through the IUIs and testing that went with it, we discovered a lot about our health…that was very helpful.

    I wish you the best.


  3. So sorry that I’m behind on your blog… my husband was the same about starting IVF {too expensive for such a small chance} but once we saw the FS and started the treatment, he completely changed his mind. Love to you always xoxo


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